I can only give so much

As an employer, we have multiple responsibilities. We have to run a business, we have to take care of the expenses, we have to be sure about the operations, the HR policies need to be in place, the employee happiness has to be maintained, we have to be considerate, we have to be motivated, we have to conform to the extremely weird “good employer standards,” and we have to do n number of other things.

However, we can only give so much. Another such instance made me finally say- “I can only give so much” to an ex-employee. I will try and be as neutral as I can and talk about it.

So there was this certain hire who wasn’t performing as well. We had to put them under review after 3 month of low performance. However, given the review, this said person started performing well. Anyway, while things had started going smooth and after the salary got credited, the said person had an unfortunate incident in their family. Nobody really assumes that someone would be lying about that, so they were given leave. It was said that they will be back in 3 days, but then one thing kept happening after the other and soon it was almost a week. Then the epiphany strikes that this person has to be with their family, and hence they need an immediate release.

As a business owner, I got a bit selfish and asked that while I understand their situation, they will have to buy out their notice period because we will have to make up for the costs. A call happens, and there is a discussion around what if they don’t pay to which the response comes that in that case, they will be considered absconding and we will not be able to give the experience letter. At 5 months old and in this era of the gig economy, nobody really bothers about the documents either. Pat comes the response, "okay then I’ll abscond." I am also told that I had given them this option. There is a heated exchange and the call is disconnected.

I call back and say that I am willing to understand and if they need some time, they might as well take it. At this point in time, I am told that I never listen, I never understand and I wasn’t even understanding what this person was going through, so now they would abscond for sure, and I can do whatever I can because suddenly I have lost all the respect that they had for me. All of this because for once I thought that NO- I have to think about the firm’s finance and minimize the losses.

No wonder they had bitched quite a lot about their ex-boss. That time, I thought maybe the ex-team wasn’t understanding. Maybe they will be happy here, but after what happened today, I will not be surprised if I am made into that shitty boss now!

I have never let my emotions get the better of me in a professional setup. I absolutely hate it when people try to fool me emotionally. I have literally seen people crying in meetings and asking for a mental health sabbatical and then switching to a job 2 weeks later.

You will have people getting hikes and then suddenly being diagnosed with life-threatening diseases. They would then need two months off post which the doctor would have advised that they can well go and play football in the league matches. There will be poor performances throughout and when you’ll finally look at firing the person, they will come up with being depressed and how they could never get it diagnosed because of “trauma and tough to open up and shit”.

I think people tend to use good employers and that is why good employers turn mean. I still give the benefit of doubt to this person, which is precisely why I am not naming them here. I think that maybe something bad really happened and that is why they did whatever they did. But was it justified? I don’t think so. I think it is way too much to expect someone to continue being good even after getting cheated again and again.

As I sit thinking about it, feeling like a used person yet again, I feel that what this person did is nothing new. I think most people tend to take such steps when they aren’t losing. This “absconding bit” is even more when we are talking about a hybrid or remote work model.

LinkedIn is full of so many bs posts about being a good leader. For a change, I was trying to be one. I never asked my employees how long do they want a leave and why? I never bother about anything till the time they are working fine.

But, if these situations keep happening, would I be wrong if I end up suspecting everything?

People don’t want to understand how tough running a business is. They just think that we have access to a secret money tree, and that is how we keep paying salaries in time. Nobody really wants to think about how tough every day is for us looking at the bank account and how despite all of this, some of us are really trying to be nice and understanding.

So, it wouldn’t be too much to ask if we are seen as not the monsters that we are made out to be. We are humans, too and we have our experiences as well. Considering that we deal with more people as employees, even statistically speaking our number of being duped or made a fool off is higher than any other average person. If we are still choosing to be nice after all this, please respect that.

Or else, at the end of the day, we are all humans, and if we turn out to be mean and bitchy later, we would just have been conditioned for that.